Dreams
I dreamt of you. Again. I’m not entirely sure if I enjoy the experience or not. I mean during everything is great and actually I’m pretty happy. Then I wake up and for a day or two I’m stuck in this “what if” type funk. By the third day it’s worn off and I’ve come to the conclusion again that it’s not happening, ever, and there is nothing I can do about it but try to forget you. It’d be so much easier if we weren’t friends, or at least friendly not that I don’t want to be friends because I do. And lets face it I can’t afford to loose many friends. But every time I hear you talk about the people you want to date I can’t help but wonder for a little while if you could possibly be talking about me. I only wish I could tell you without worrying about it making things weird.
When did I get so…emotional about this sort of thing? I need to get it together. Maybe get out more or something, socialize that sort of thing. I’ve got no time to be entertaining the thought of a relationship when my life has gone to shit. But who am I kidding? Sometimes even monsters have hearts.
